Five Things I Learned in February

It’s Leap Day – like a whole bonus day in our year. And it’s Monday, which does leave me wishing we got an extra weekend day. But, you know, I’m always wishing for more time, so I’ll take what I can get!

Speaking of weekends, as a stay-at-home mom who does some freelance work on the side, I’m always surprised with how glad I am for Friday to get here. I thrive on routine, but I’ve really been loving the other days – the ones that break from the usual. So even though I spend quite a bit of time at home during the week, I really love the weekends when all my people are here and our lives don’t revolve around school and work calendars.

1. Spontaneity is good for my Type A soul.

Our best friends had four free extra passes to Winter Jam in Nashville (two hours from our house) and offered them to us the day before the concert. We decided to go, meaning we drove two hours after school for a five-hour concert, and then two hours home. We got home at 1:30 am, and thankfully all three kids slept nearly the whole way home, but they were all up past their bedtimes. Ben did take a nap in an awkward position in his chair while musicians and speakers blared throughout the arena.

I’m so glad we went. The road trip was good for my soul and connection with my husband. (We have some of our best talks in the car!) And we got to hear Lauren Daigle, Sidewalk Prophets, Matthew West, Crowder, and For King & Country (and some bands I cared much less about).

2. Sometimes two books have a message so intertwined you know you were meant to read them at the same time.

That’s how it was with “The Gift of Friendship: Stories That Celebrate the Beauty of Shared Moments” and “Better Together: Because You’re Not Meant to Mom Alone.” They’re different books with a similar message of we aren’t meant to do life alone because we really are better – stronger, kinder, wiser, funnier – together.

In “The Gift of Friendship,” Dawn Camp has compiled stories from different writers that celebrate and encourage real-life friends. Jill Savage and her daughter Anne McClane offer practical advice and inspiration for moms in “Better Together.” Friendship requires vulnerability and books like these are good companions for the journey.

{Here's a real-life story on friendship from my own life. And here's some mom confessions inspired by a theme from "Better Together" with information on how to get free resources if you order the book before it releases tomorrow.}

3. Colleen Coble is an author I like.

I bought one of her books – “Tidewater Inn”  – when the Kindle version was really cheap several months ago. I needed something recently to keep me company on the treadmill so I started it and was hooked. I immediately continued to the second book in the series and then the third. Turns out, Coble has written tons of books, so that’s good for me.

{Here’s the Hope Beach series I’ve devoured :: Tidewater Inn // Rosemary Cottage // Seagrass Pier}

They’ve been an entertaining combination of romance and suspense set on an island that makes me want to go to the Outer Banks. Plus the characters are likeable and it’s fun to see their stories intertwine. Once I finish “Seagrass Pier,” I’m likely to read the other few series she’s written.

4. RSV is vicious.

I’ve never had a baby get RSV … until last week. Third baby is a charm, apparently. Of course, the other two coughed and had low-grade fevers, but RSV didn’t keep them down like it did Rachel. I knew she was sick when she went a couple days without really smiling. {See an Instagram post about that.} It was sad to have her coughing and lethargic, but I did enjoy the extra snuggles with my baby girl who seems so big some days.

5. I’m having fun planning and designing a new monthly newsletter.

And by new, I mean, one that never existed from me to you!

I’ve been messing around with MailChimp, and I’m excited to launch my monthly newsletter on March 1 {TOMORROW!}. And if you subscribe to my newsletter and posts, you’ll get a FREE #choosingJOY printable.

I have other plans for my email friends – who are likely to receive other free gifts and be among the first to hear news, like when I finally get around to updating my ebook (hello, third child).

I’m grateful for those of you who already let me into your inbox! {The rest of you can subscribe here.}

Happy Leap Day! How was your February?
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I'm linking up with Emily Freeman, like I do at the end of every month. 

{2013} June. July. August. September. October. November. 

{2014} January. February. March. April. May. June. 

July. August. September. October. November. December. 
{2015} January. February. March. April. May. June. 
July. August. September. October. November. December.
{2016} January. 

Want more insights? Subscribe to get new posts in your inbox and a monthly newsletter with content not available on the blog. When you subscribe, I'll send you a FREE #choosingJOY printable. 

 "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, or follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin'.

Friendship is a gift because we are better together

“I’m putting out a call to be brave. To embrace the sweetness and the depth of real friendship. To hold ourselves to a higher standard than silence. To become the kind of friend we pray our daughters have. This kind of friendship isn’t easy. It’s hard and messy and can come with real heartache. But it can also come with richness and love and someone to really do life with too, and it is so worth it.”

{Anna Rendell in “Gift of Friendship”}

As soon as I read the paragraph, I snapped a picture and texted it to a friend.

It’s true, friendship is brave. {Tweet that.}

It’s where we let people in – to our sometimes messy houses and lives. It’s where we walk into other people’s stuff – which isn’t put away in a tidy closet. It’s when we make time for each other and choose to do life together. And, along the way, sometimes friendships hit bumps we don’t expect.

That paragraph reminded me a friend I met when Cate was 4 months old, just as I was becoming a stay-at-home mom. We quickly clicked and started hanging out even when our moms group wasn’t meeting. We lunched together, spent hours preparing meals for our freezers, went to the pool and one another’s houses, and celebrated birthdays and holidays.

And then our kids went to school and getting together became harder logistically. Our schedules were very different. I had one in school and one in preschool who was with me the majority of the time. She was homeschooling two.

We still touched base in texts and visits, but those became fewer as we settled into this new season that revolved around the school calendar. More than once, I cried about missing her, even though she only lived a few miles away. Sure, we said we missed each other, but we didn’t let our actions reflect those words.

And then we did.

We decided it’s worth saying: You matter. Even if getting together requires thinking outside the box. Even when seasons change and calendars are crowded.

Earlier this year, she reached out in an email. She told me about where her heart was. At the same time, Facebook was showing me near-daily memories of when we used to spend multiple times a week together with our babies who turned into toddlers who turned into these big kids.

We talked about what had changed and discussed ways to reclaim some of what was lost.

Her birthday was soon after this conversation, so I reached out. “What day could I bring you lunch from your choice of a restaurant?” I asked in a text. We settled on a date, and then I took her lunch, my lunch, and my baby to her house. We sat in the living room sharing a meal and once again sharing our lives while her kids worked independently on school. Turns out, our daughters are actually using the same math book.

What do multiplication, measurement, and division have to do with friendship? Well, as her daughter worked on that day’s lesson, I realized mine would be doing it soon. In other words: For as much as things changed, there’s still plenty of shared ground on which to keeping building our friendship.
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“The Gift of Friendship: Stories That Celebrate the Beauty of Shared Moments” is of full stories by different writers that prompted me to reminisce on moments I’ve shared with my own friends. Community is worth celebrating and that’s what this book does beautifully. There are stories of heartache redeemed, surprise friendships, and everyday community that reinforced my belief we really are better together.

In addition to Anna Rendell’s timely essay, editor Dawn Camp has compiled stories from Holley Gerth, Jennifer Dukes Lee, Jennifer Turner, Mary Carver, Lisa-Jo Baker, Liz Curtis Higgins, Crystal Paine, and many others.

This beautiful 224-page hardback book officially releases today and is available on Amazon and most anywhere else you like to buy books.
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I’ve also recently read “Better Together: Because You Aren’t Meant to Mom Alone” by Jill Savage with her daughter Anne McClane. This book offers practical, encouraging insights to why having a tribe of moms to share life with is healthy and helpful.

“Better Together” doesn’t officially release until March 1, but it’s the kind of book every new mom should have and one that helps those of us who have been here awhile too. There are ideas for co-ops, encouragement if you’re facing hard times in friendship, an informative Mothering Personality Inventory that may explain some of why you mother the way you do, and Biblical truths of what friendship matters in our everyday life and our faith journeys.
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And there's a giveaway! 

One of you will win a hardback copy of “The Gift of Friendship: Stories That Celebrate the Beauty of Shared Moments,” thanks to publisher Revell Books. This giveaway is open to U.S. residents through Monday, March 28 and a winner will be randomly selected on March 29. Use the Rafflecopter below for various ways to enter.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

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I received free copy of "Gift of Friendship" and an advanced PDF version of "Better Together" to review in exchange for helping promote them. These opinions are my own and I'm thinking it's likely I'll mention both books around here again. Revell Books also gave me a free copy of "Gift of Friendship" to share with one of you.

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

7 Things I Learned in December

I know December is really about all things Christmas, but I'm sharing some things {seven things, to be exact ...} I learned this month THAT ARE NOT CHRISTMAS RELATED. Of course, if you want to read about our Christmas, I wrote about that.

Here. {A Jesus Birthday Party Tradition}

And here. {Christmas Around Here}

And here. {Merry & Bright}

So, closing out 2015, here are seven things I learned in December ...

1. Rachel loves this Fisher-Price Sit-Me-Up Floor Seat.

I don’t feel compelled to buy contraptions for my babies with the exception of the papasan swing all three have loved. But when I saw a picture of a friend’s baby in it, I knew she’s love it.

Of course, now with Christmas, she has some new contraptions I’m sure she’ll soon also love because already loves standing in our laps, trying to be bigger than she seems.

2. Goodbyes are hard regardless of your age.

One of my best friends and her family recently moved from Murray. They’re still in Kentucky – but they’re about four hours away and settling into a new normal that’s far away. This has been sad for Ben too because Sarah’s oldest child, Davey, is his age and they haven’t known their first six years without each other.

For years, we’ve lunched together nearly every Sunday after church. Sarah and I would get together during the week and text an ever-continuing conversation throughout the days. Thankfully, the texting remains!

And then THE SAME WEEKEND this month, our college friend who has been one of the few people outside our immediate circle to babysit our kids moved. I mean, congratulations, Amber, you graduated. But, um, we miss you already.

3. Cate and I have revived our back-and-forth journal writing and it’s good for my soul – both as a writer and a momma.

4. Tornado watches and thunderstorms are possible on Christmas Eve Eve. 

And then it kept raining FOR DAYS, literally. Now nearby Kentucky Lake is rising above normal summer pool IN THE WINTER. (There’s a whole long explanation about the dam and the river that I barely understand.)

5. Cate now wears adult women’s shoes. 

She's 8 1/2 years old. Geez. How did THAT happen?! The day after purchasing some size 6 purple Nikes, she borrowed my socks.

6. "The West Wing" is good. 

I know, I’m a whole decade behind. But it’s our latest TV binge.

7. Speaking of television shows, Cate’s into “Full House,” which makes me happy and nostalgic.

Tell me about your December. How was your Christmas? Did you learn anything worth remembering?
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I'm linking up with Emily Freeman, like I do at the end of every month. 

{2013} June. July. August. September. October. November. 

{2014} January. February. March. April. May. June. 

July. August. September. October. November. December. 
{2015} January. February. March. April. May. June. 
July. August. September. October. November.

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

On Going Home {a #ThreeWordWednesday post}

People talk about going home for Christmas. For me, home is really about people. I don’t live where I grew up, and I love building my home where I am now. But sometimes home goes with me other places.

One of my favorite holiday traditions is getting together with my childhood friend Bekah who is married to another long-time friend of mine. They have three kids who are close in age to Cate and Ben. Some years we get together with other friends of ours, but sometimes it’s just our two families.

Either way, getting together with her is like coming home – regardless of where we actually are. Last year it was a fancy restaurant with just a table full of adults. This year is was brunch with our two families – party of 10, please.

I also got to spend a few hours with my childhood neighbor-turned-best-friend Katie. We can sit and talk wherever we are like no time has lapsed between visits – this time it was in a brightly colored, noisy arcade. Fun fact: We actually used to work at the amusement park that houses the arcade. Now called The Renaissance Fun Park, we were actually there so my kids and their cousins could burn off some energy. They were in the house for DAYS, thanks to all the rain. And, well, all boy moms everywhere understand that doesn’t work.

So while they played laser tag and arcade games, we talked. We reminisced about when we were employees there in the summers of 1997 and 1998, when it was called The Park at Middletown. We took a selfie in the rain because we had to see what had changed and what had stayed the same.

There are a couple other friends I didn’t get to connect with like I wanted to, but I did get to see more family than usual in Louisville this past weekend. Two aunts, two uncles, my grandpa, a cousin and her husband plus my more immediate parents, brother, sister-in-law, niece and nephew. I did miss my sister, brother-in-law and their growing family, but they were at home in Buffalo, NY, adjusting to being a family of five with newborn twins.

Walking down memory lane with friends and making new memories is what coming home truly is about for me. The visits don’t always go as planned. I usually want more time before returning to my physical home – which is where my favorites live – but then I get back here and remember it’s where I’m supposed to be.

Here is home too. Sometimes it seems like everything is always changing, but going home and coming home always reminds me of the important foundations that remain the same. Really, life is more about being at home wherever you are than it is actually coming or going home – all while we wait for our eternal home. {Tweet that.}

Who or where is home to you?
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An InLinkz Link-up

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

7 Things I Learned in October

We’re settled in as a family of five and things are are going well. So well, I can’t believe we’re at the end of October. Maybe more people makes time go faster ... okay, probably not. Even so, here are tidbits from my month ...

1. More Gilmore Girls is coming!

Specifically, four 90-minute episodes on Netflix in 2016. Whoo-hoo! You can find all kinds of articles on Google, but here’s the first one I read when the news hit social media.

2. My baby girl is petite but strong.

She’s measuring in the 25th percentile in both height and weight, but she also likes to be on her belly and hold her head up. I can’t believe she’ll be six weeks old tomorrow!

3. A little glue can help a head wound well.

I don’t mean Elmer’s, although the surgical glue seemed about the same! Ben tripped at the playground during Fall Break and landed face-first on the ground … and apparently on a rock that punctured his head. (Yes, this is his second rock-induced injury, if you’re keeping track.)

4. The 62nd of Martin Luther’s 95 Theses is my favorite: “The true treasure of the Church is the Most Holy Gospel of the glory and the grace of God.”

I read through all of the 95 statements, propositions and questions that Luther wrote, thus prompting the Protestant Reformation, because I was organizing an activity for Reformation Day – which happens to be today at my kids’ school.

5. The Marketside BBQ Chopped Salad from Walmart is amazing.

So amazing, I went in Walmart, which I usually avoid, JUST FOR THE SALAD. And AFTER I already grocery shopped across the street at Kroger. I may be obsessed. I just wish I could order the salad online …

6. Thanksgiving is just as good a month early.

We have a tradition celebrating Thanksgiving with three other families. (If you’ve read my ebook, I talk about this tradition and these people in there.) Well, unfortunately, one of those families is moving, so we celebrated early. I’m so glad we did. Sure, Thanksgiving comes officially in November, but giving thanks is good any time of the year. And the turkey, dressing, green beans, jalapeno corn, rolls, cheesecake, and strawberry cake tasted as good as ever.

(And, no, I did not make the turkey this year. Praise God!)

7. Political sign stakes can effectively double as hot dog roasters.

I learned this because I suggested it to Greg earlier this month when we decided to have an impromptu hot dog roast for dinner with friends and didn’t have an wire hangers. It worked well, which I can say confidently based on the tastiness of the end result.

Tell me about your October. How did you spend it? What did you learn?
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I'm linking up with Emily Freeman for my favorite monthly recaps. Read other Things I Learned posts ::

{2013} June. July. August. September. October. November. 

{2014} January. February. March. April. May. June. 

July. August. September. October. November. December. 
{2015} January. February. March. April. May. June. 
July. August. September.

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

4 Ways to Let Friendships Change with the Seasons

Lately, God has been showing me how he authors changes, even the ones that come in relationships. That doesn’t always mean changes are easy, but knowing that truth does mean I see changes differently. Because, yes, when life changes, so do friendships.

(I know, I don't really like it either!)

I’ve shared before, I’m the kind of person who wants to hold on tightly to friendships so things stay as they’ve always been with people choose I to be around. But that’s not realistic, as God is teaching me in this season of many changes.

I’m sharing these four ways to let friendships change with the seasons – for you, yes, but as reminders for myself too. And when I say “let” I really mean I’m slowly learning to hold loosely the people I love, even when on some days I want to pull them all closely and hunker down in a commune-like bubble.

1. Find new ways to hang out.

One of my dearest friends home schools and now that my kids are both in school, we haven’t hung out as much as we used to during the week. So I met her at the park one day for lunch. We got to talk, the weather was beautiful, and her kids got to play. Win-win-win.

My best friend works full time now after being a home with her kids most of the past nine years. So we’ve met for a later-than-usual dinner after my kids’ soccer practice and walked (and talked!) after school.

2. Reach out to friends as you pray for them.

I have many friends going through things. They’re waiting on babies to be born. They’re waiting on adoption processes to move or moving through the adoption processes they’ve been waiting for. There are medical situations and job changes. So I put them on my prayer list and then I check in with them, even if that means sending a text with some encouragement or a quote that reminded me of them.

“There is something beautiful about being thought of, isn’t there? When I think of all that hangs off everyone’s plates – errands to complete, children to care for, responsibilities to follow through on – to know the Lord brought you to their mind is an amazing gift in and of itself.”

{Kristen Strong in “Girl Meets Change”}

Reaching out doesn’t have be complicated, especially with today’s technology. Even when changes are for the good, they can be hard on people. Being present with prayers is a practical way to be there for people you love. {Tweet that.}

3. Remember not to take their changes personally.

It’s true that a close friend’s circumstances can affect your life and have ripple effects. But I’ve had to remind myself God’s plans for one family often won’t look like his plans for mine. You can encourage them in whatever is happening for them – take my friend’s full-time that her family needs financially – and still process the effects on your life.

4. Notice the provision God has for you.

When a friendship changes because of logistics and schedules, I grieve what we used to have. And that is okay and healthy. But those changes don’t mean God is leaving us without. So many times I’ve seen new friendships develop or old friendships take a new shape in my life.

Yes, sometimes people are in our life for a particular season. Sometimes we see the big picture in those scenarios and sometimes we have to hold onto the promise that God is for us and working all things together for the good even when we can’t see the whole thing.

Sometimes the provision looks like new friendships. My closest friends are done having babies, but God has put a different circle of people who are pregnant and adopting in my life. God knows what we need and provides that – even when it surprises us. {Tweet that.}

What would add to the list?
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I’ve mentioned “Girl Meets Change” by Kristen Strong a few times around here and I’ll mention it again. It’s the perfect companion for those seasons when change is happening. This book releases soon, but you can preorder it now – and I recommend you do!

I'm linking up this post with the Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood Gathering. 

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

Three Word Wednesday :: Life is Movement

Is it possible this summer was the fastest in history? I’m going to say yes, even though I realize time is a steady measurement of our days. But, still, this summer was full of movement for our family.

And by movement, I don’t mean we ran all over the place – although on some days we did.

This summer marked some transitions, most of which y’all have heard about here on the blog.

In April, we sold a lake house we loved. But in June we got to buy a new one that we may love more. In May, we met the birth mom of our daughter who is expected to arrive in late September. A room is in the process of being prepared for Rachel Elizabeth, who officially as a crib, bedding, and a changing table awaiting her arrival. The high chair, swing, stroller, car seat are in boxes in her room, but they’ll be ready sooner rather than later.

Meanwhile, my best friend Jaclyn went back to full-time work, which obviously is a blessing for her, but an adjustment for our friendship. We befriended each other as single college girls, so our friendship is no stranger to transition. We were married the same summer, walked through seasons of infertility together, and then ending up having five kids who love each like siblings in five years.

Another dear friend has transitions of her own happening that will overflow into my life and God has orchestrated a newer friendship in my life I’m really excited about.

Oh, and Ben starts kindergarten today.

That means I’ll have about six weeks (probably) with Cate and Ben in school before Rachel arrives. I have big plans for those weeks – going to doctors’ appointments, getting my hair cut and colored, scrapbooking, finishing Rachel’s room, and lunching with some friends.

(Sure, I’ll let you know what those six weeks actually end up looking like!)

God knew I would need some wisdom in this season of transition because it’s no secret I’ve resisted change like the plague in the past. I want to embrace what God is doing here. The movement is evidence of the abundant life God promises. {Tweet that.} 

I can see how God is providing and answering prayers and offering opportunities to make himself known. Of course, all of this comes on the heels of our Guatemala mission trip, which is filtering everything in my life different than before.

Kristen Strong wrote a book that been exactly what I needed. Being able to be part of her launch team and read an early copy of “Girl Meets Change” was perfect timing. Stay tuned because there will be more to come on that when it releases next month, but for now, I wanted to share a quote:

“While we are called to rest when appropriate, the nature of life itself is movement. We can stand rigid against the movement and break, or we can lean into flexibility by bending and moving with it.”

{Kristen Strong in “Girl Meets Change,” page 76}

There has been some resting this summer. Hello, afternoons at the pool and waking up without an actual alarm clock. But there has been much movement too.

I’m learning the movement is evidence of life – literally, with new baby we’re expecting and in the ways God is making himself known. I want to bend and move with it. I want to remember moving boxes is hard work but it is part of letting God rearrange our lives. I want to rest in how God has prepared me for what he’s doing.

What kinds of changes are you experiencing in your life?
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Some housekeeping for #ThreeWordWednesday friends: Please link up just ONE post. When you link up more than one, it seems to distract from the goal to have other people visiting each other with encouragement. Thanks for understanding!

An InLinkz Link-up

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

Three Word Wednesday :: Our Salvation Comes

Cate was baptized this past Sunday – about three weeks after she decided to on the shores of a foreign country to follow Jesus with this gesture. Greg had the honor of baptizing her in front of our best friends and some family members in our church, where Cate has heard so much about this God we prayed for her to believe in.

We celebrated afterward by singing “Days of Elijah,” a praise song she chose. Honestly, I thought it was unusual song to celebrate a baptism, but as we were singing it, I realized it was perfect:

“Out of Zion’s hills salvation comes ... There's no God like Jehovah.”

We came back to our house and shared a taco lunch with the people closest to us. They’re the ones who do life with us on a nearly daily basis. They’re the ones who have helped us teach our kids about Jesus.

Many times, people can pinpoint the moment they decided to follow Jesus and recall where they were when they decided to get baptized. But, really, salvation comes as a process.

I think about my own story. Like any high schooler, I was searching for identity and trying to make sense of life. The questions abounded, leading the conversations with friends. Then God led me to Romans 8:28:

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

It was not long afterward, when I was away from my friends and family at a Chrysalis weekend that I took that first step toward really following Jesus. That was more than 19 years ago. First steps are important. But the ones that follow become our stories. {Tweet that.}

Likewise, God had been working on Cate’s heart long before we got to Guatemala, but it was there God wove together all he had been doing and made her need for Jesus clear. Her decision to be baptized was the perfect ending to our mission trip. Her actual baptism was a moment that will be etched in her story forever. But all of that was just the beginning to what else God has for her.
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An InLinkz Link-up

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

What I Learned in Guatemala

“O my people, listen to my instructions. Open your ears to what I am saying, for I will speak to you in a parable. I will teach you hidden lessons from our past — stories we have heard and known, stories our ancestors handed down to us. We will not hide these truths from our children; we will tell the next generation about the glorious deeds of the Lord, about his power and his mighty wonders.”

{Psalm 78:1-4 NLT}

I answered some questions last week about our mission trip to Guatemala. After I had that post drafted, my friend Kayse messaged me. Among the catch up was this: “I’d love to hear more about Guatemala! What did you learn?” Well, now that’s a question!

The whole trip was a step out of my comfort zone. With travel and logistics, I ended up being away from Ben for nine days – the longest I’d ever been away from either of the kids. I spent the week in a country whose language I didn’t speak. So, of course, I learned some things. I saw new things and experienced moments unique to that time and place.

But one thing that surprised me and taught me was the way our team served each other.

There were 13 of us from five different churches Murray area and four others who live there and work for Bethel Ministries International. Very few of us had relationships before preparing for this trip. Sure, our local group had meetings since January, when we all committed to go. And we did some fundraisers together.

But seeing God work within our group – in our conversations, prayers, laughter and service – was something I want to hold onto. Before Guatemala, God had been showing me how relationships come – and sometimes go, unfortunately – with seasons. My natural instinct is to huddle all my people together – around the table or in my Facebook newsfeed – and never let go.

Serving together for a week will build connections – and those connections won’t look like other friendships. {Tweet that.} While building houses, we had conversations that mattered about our lives back home. We talked about what God’s doing in our jobs and with our families. We trusted each other with pieces of our stories.

One of my favorite moments from the week came in the hotel parking lot. The whole team had just gotten back from eating together when one of the guys shared with Greg and me about a hard conversation he and his fiancée were having across the miles that separated them. They’re farther apart than Greg and I ever were, but we remember how hard distance can be on a relationship. We shared some things from our own 17 years of knowing each other. Like a dose of reality mixed with hope, we told him how building a relationship that lasts is hard work but how it’s worth it. And then Greg got a chance to pray with him.

Those are the moments that bond people and build a foundation for what God wants to do.

I had other encouraging conversations throughout the week. I shared about our current adoption plan and pieces of my faith testimony. I heard about other people’s dreams of new jobs, ministry opportunities, and schooling decisions. {Read more about how we spent the week in Guatemala.}

One night when we were reflecting on our day, one of the guys said, “We were listening to all these worship songs that make you want to do something. And here we are doing something.” It’s true – together we worked and worshipped. God was there and he moved throughout the week with us. And I believe he’s going to do more because of that week together in Guatemala.

I was reminded how service can happen wherever you are. {Tweet that.}

Sure, it's easy to serve in Guatemala, where the needs are so obvious. People don't have enough food and clothing. One family we had met had never heard about Jesus. Another family had but gave their lives to Christ for the first time.

But needs still exist wherever we are – in a hotel parking lot with a new friend, while we’re sharing a meal with friends we’ve known for years, when I pick up our daughter’s birth mom for a prenatal doctor’s appointment, when we work in our ordinary lives, and down the street from our home that lacks for nothing. God wants to use us – and our stories – to meet those needs. 

I don’t want to unsee what God showed me in Guatemala so I can be sure to see what he has for me here.
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In other another moment in Guatemala earlier this month, I also learned Cate wants to be baptized. This was such a sweet surprise to end our week in Guatemala. And it’s happening SUNDAY! {Obviously, there will be more to come on that!}
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I'm linking up with Emily Freeman for my favorite monthly recaps. Read other Things I Learned posts :: {From 2013} June. July. August. September. October. November. {From 2014} January. February. March. April. May. June. July. August. September. October. November. December. {From 2015} January. February. March. April. May. June.

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

Just another {melancholy} Monday

It was a Monday of appointments and errands. I dragged the kids around – not literally – most of the day. They were troopers, but they were restless and turned up their volume. We got a lot done, but I was kind of done with the day before the day could be done.

While driving around and taking care of business, my head was full of thoughts and introspections and ideas and conversations. I answered kids’ questions and explained things – things I didn’t really think needed explaining – more than once. I wondered why my 5-year-old son still doesn’t understand lunch comes in the middle of the day and dinner comes when Daddy comes home from work. Of course, some days Daddy comes home for lunch or we meet him somewhere.

Not on Monday, though.

My kids ate popcorn chicken from Walmart’s deli. Yes, it was Lunchables last week. AND, Y’ALL, I HAD TO GO BACK TO WALMART FOR THE SECOND WEEK IN A ROW BECAUSE BIG LOTS LET ME DOWN. And then the kids saved the plastic lid to their popcorn chicken containers and used them as boats in the bathtub when we got home. Nobody was bathing. But they were happy and united. So whatever.

{Yes, my kids are creative. Last week they played with cardboard boxes, remember?}

I meal planned last week for the first time in many, many weeks. I knew Monday was going to be busy, so wisely put chicken fajitas in the crock pot this morning. I win – at least this time.

It may have been a melancholy Monday, but it was also a fabulous mail day.

I like to post on Instagram.

First of all, my friend Mandy surprised me with some #choosingJOY goodies – stickers and stamps. Her note encouraged me when I needed a little extra love. And then another package was “Women Are Scary: The Totally Awkward Adventure of Finding Mom Friends” by Melanie Dale, a book I’d forgotten I’d won in Christen’s blog giveaway.

Not long afterward, I started reading “Women Are Scary” and was laughing and crying IN THE FIRST CHAPTER. For real. Melanie Dale opens the book with a quote from “Billy Madison” – which alone may just have made me chuckle, but knowing my husband can quote SO MUCH of the movie made me appreciate the opening words even more. And then she starts talking about infertility and adoption.

“I saw motherhood as giving something up. It never occurred to me what I’d gain. My rough road to motherhood grew my character and readied me to join this incredible group of women, powerhouse women changing lives around the world together.”

{Melanie Dale in “Women Are Scary,” page 12}

{Cue the tears. Because I didn’t know if I wanted to be a mom. Until I did. And then God made me a mom in a way I never expected and built my faith in a whole new way.}

I quickly got sucked into the book. And then my family wanted to eat dinner. Good thing I had something in the crock pot, otherwise these people may have had to fend for themselves. And then later in the evening, I plopped myself on one end of the couch while my girl played Minecraft on the other, and read and read and read. And laughed and got teary and laughed again – sometimes in the same sentence, certainly often on the same page.

{Greg went back to work for a couple hours. Ben was finally, thankfully, sleeping. Although he told me the next morning he actually cleaned his room after I put him to bed. I have such mixed reactions – hooray for cleaning your room! But, um, hello, your day was done, son.}

I ended up binge-reading the whole book.

Here’s the thing, I thought I was escaping some of the thoughts in my head – the ones about friendships that have entered seasons I don’t love, the ones about a dear childhood friend I thought would be a forever friend, the ones about all the chaos and darkness in the world, the ones about what God is doing in our family, and the ones about serving others. But I didn’t actually escape what was in my head and heart because what Melanie wrote is real. She may have quoted some movies I don’t care about, but the bottom line is what women do as mothers is brave.

And, yes, some days are emotionally exhausting – sometimes for no one reason. But all of the days matter – even the hard ones that drive us to Jesus – and probably Text Support with The Mother Network. {Right, Melanie?}
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9 Things I Learned in May

May is my favorite month. And not just because it's my birthday. Although, I have told some people about how I was excited to turn 36 because it's my favorite number {nerd alert, I know!}. And, y'all, by the first week of my favorite month, I knew not much was going to top all the goodness.

But let's back up a little. Here's a list of what's happened in our life since April 22:

Greg opened an office in Hazel. We sold our lake house. We celebrated three birthdays with two parties and then Mother's Day. Ben has his tonsils and adenoids removed. We have another lake house under contract. We met a birth mom and began the adoption process, including the home study documentation. We've had fundraisers for our Guatemala mission trip. Cate had strep throat. Greg moved his main office in Murray.

That doesn't even include normal school stuff, soccer practices and games, church commitments, and hanging out with friends.

So, here I go, talking about adoption, school, TV, celebrations, household chores, and my new favorite drink before May totally escapes me.

Obviously, these things come to you in no particular order ...

1. "One Tree Hill' is a good show. I needed a new show to watch as I fold laundry and walk on the treadmill. This one is working for me. {Here's looking at you, fans of "Gilmore Girls," "Hart of Dixie," "Dawson's Creek," "Felicity" ... if you're behind the times like me! But it doesn't top the crew from Capside or Stars Hollow.}

And, hello, I love the theme song! I'm at the beginning of season three right now, and there's been a lot of good music. Oh, and Greg watches it with me now too.

But, seriously, these kids and their problems aren't in high school. No way.

3. Having an online book club where we discussed a chapter a week forced me to slow down and really soak in the message. And "You're Loved No Matter What: Freeing Your Heart from the Need to Be Perfect" by Holley Gerth was one my soul needed.

3. People really do celebrate Cinco de Mayo. Four friends and I went I celebrate my birthday a couple days late at a local Mexican restaurant we all love. We couldn't figure out why it was crowded on a Tuesday night. And then we realized we'd missed the memo on the holiday. We're cool like that.

4. People like free. In four days at the beginning of May, I offered my ebook for free. I'm so grateful for the hundreds (!!!) of people who downloaded it. {Hey, if you were one of the 1,682 people (!!!) who downloaded "Peace in the Process," I'd really love for you to leave a review once you've finished reading.}

5. We're buying a lake house. We'd been looking since before we closed in April on the sale of our other one that we really didn't even want to sell but needed to because of circumstances beyond our control. But we found another one that we may end up loving more. The property is amazing. And we have plans to make the house even better.

6. I have a third-grader and kindergartner. Okay, well, I didn't just learn this. But this just happened. I mean, it will happen in August. Which counts as now. BECAUSE SCHOOL'S OUT ... FOR THE ... SUMMER! In fact, I wrote about my Summer Not-To-Do List at Circles of Faith this week.

7. We're adopting a baby due in September! Yeah, I know, I just said I was sending my youngest to kindergarten. God's timing is funny ... and perfect. {And I've already written a whole post about this, in case you missed it.}

And, just for fun, you should know I initially connected with the birth mom and learned the lake house owner accepted our offer on the same day, which happened to be Cinco de Mayo. No wonder people celebrate it ...

8. Crystal Light makes a grape-flavored drink that reminds me of grape Kool-Aid. I lived off grape Kool-Aid when I was a kid. I was so excited when my friend Julie offered me this as a drink of choice at her house. She gave me a packet to take home and the item was immediately added to my grocery list.

9. Sorting dirty clothes by people before washing them is more effective than sorting them by color. I realize some of you just cringed. But, seriously, this is making my life easier. Each person has a bin in the laundry room, and then when it's full, I wash that person's clothes. It cuts out the sorting as I'm folding them and the rooting through baskets looking for something.

So, how was your May?
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I'm linking up with Emily Freeman's Facebook page and the Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood Gathering.

Here are previous Things I Learned posts :: {From 2013} June. July. August. September. October. November. {From 2014} January. February. March. April. May. June. July. August. September. October. November. December. {From 2015} January. February. March. April.

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

Hope from the weekend

Most Sunday nights I stay up later than I should because I don’t want the weekend to end. Cate has only seven days of school left – although one of those will be spent in Nashville at the zoo and the Aquarium Restaurant – so I’m even more eager than usual to break out of the weekday routine.

This past weekend was full of some particularly sweet, hope-filled moments.

In October 1990, a new family moved next door to my family in Mockingbird Valley subdivision in Oldham County, Kentucky. I don’t remember how long it took Katie and I to become friends, but I’m glad my life since has included her. Since moving out of that neighborhood, we’ve lived hundreds of miles apart, and we’ve lived in the same town. We’ve texted and emailed and talked on the phone. We’ve mailed letters and presents. We’ve been in each other’s weddings and loved on each other’s kids. Even though we aren’t neighbors anymore, we can pick up where we left off when we do get to hang out.

This time we got to hang out for not quite 24 hours. Katie treated me to the gift of time. She sneaked away from her family to come hang out with mine four hours away. We shared meals, caught up with stories, and sat around in our soft pants. She snuggled with my kids and laughed at their jokes.

We parted ways after eating Thai food, but we’ve talked on the phone and texted more than once since Saturday afternoon. Katie has known me and loved me since I was 11 years old. I cherish our history. A little time with her always makes me wish for more but leaves me grateful the conversation we share is ongoing.

The second half of my weekend involved conversations with newer friends with whom I share passions. Hope That Binds had a picnic for its volunteers Saturday evening on a beautiful property in Carlisle County. I’ve loved connecting with this adoption ministry and helping with the quarterly newsletter and some events that connection families who love adoption. The evening was full of adoption stories, many kids who loved the chance to swim even though it wasn’t even 80 degrees, good food, reminders that God created us for community, and hope of what’s to come next.

On Sunday, our Guatemala mission team had a Trades of Hope fundraiser. It was a win-win, for sure. Our friend Becky Lile donated her commission from sales from our party to our team’s fund for the needed supplies for wheelchair distribution, home construction, and food and clothing distribution. Trades of Hope has fabulous fair trade accessories – jewelry, bags, stationary, scarves, home décor – that empower female artisans who are working their way out of poverty. It’s more than charity because these women are taught how to run a sustainable business.

(Actually, the party link will open for at least a few more days, if you’re interested in coming along side us for this fundraiser.)

Hope was the theme – and not just because I spent time with Hope That Binds and Trades of Hope. Seeing hope is choosing joy for my soul. {Tweet that.}

The history of my friendship with Katie – and other friends who have walked through so many different seasons of change with me – gives me hope because those moments then helped make me into who I am now. Meanwhile, new friends offer fresh hope that what we’re doing together now matters.

How are you experiencing hope these days?
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I'm linking up with the Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood Gathering, where hope abounds. 

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

On raising a party planner

Cate asked if she could have a Frozen-themed party for the second birthday in a row. I told her to let it go and then tossed out some other party themes based on her current obsessions. Praise God the Boxcar Children – and the 150 books about these kids – won out.

I’m not exaggerating about there being 150 books in the series.

And my girl can tell you exactly which ones she’s read.

She pretty much planned her party and I went along with her details. I suggested a few things she embraced, but it was all rooted in her idea. Party favors were Boxcar Children books, 10 color pens, mini notebooks, and fuzzy bookmarks that were meant to be colored. My cake-decorating friend Courtney re-created an edible boxcar. The girls made their own boxcars – because, hello, why wouldn’t there be decorative paper and glue at a party with 15 girls?

Oh and there milk boxes as the party drink. Here’s how that happened …

Me: Hey, Cate, what kind of drinks do you want me to get for your party? I could get root beer or Fanta.

Cate: This is going to sound weird, but the Boxcar Children drank a lot of milk. You could get those boxes of milk, the different flavors.

Um, whatever. I barely like milk at appropriate times – like the mornings or with a very chocolatey piece of cake. I can’t even think about drinking it when I’m sweating. But 24 boxes of vanilla, chocolate and strawberry milk were drank up before the day was done.

We broke out a parachute and jump rope my mom brought – Grandmom for the party win, really. {Side note: These girls had some jump rope talents I didn’t know existed!} Those items weren’t boxcar-related, but, well, this was the first time in almost all Cate’s birthday party days that Mother Nature didn’t pour water from the cloud. Seriously, we were so glad to see the sunshine – even if it meant 89 degrees in the single digits of May.

I’m apparently raising a party planner. She’s into the details, the order of event, the invitations, the list of who has RSVPed they’re coming, and, of course, the socializing. I hope she’s into writing thank you notes when she’s recovered from strep throat.

And, really, I couldn’t be happier about raising a party planner. I like to have something else in common with my girl – the one I know God planned for me, the one who quickly taught me sharing DNA isn’t the most important quality in making a family, the one who has a kind heart.
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I'm joining Jennifer Dukes Lee for #TellHisStory because celebrations are some of my very favorite stories to tell. And I'm linking with Mary Carver's Works for Me Wednesday because raising a party planner AND having a book-themed party work for me!

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

Mission to Guatemala

Sometimes I get too caught up in my own life. My own frustrations, shortcomings, dreams, friendships, and daily routine consume my thinking. Even the good things in my life sometimes blind to me to the bigger picture.

God’s giving me a chance to really step out of my life and serve others. Of course, I can and do serve here in my ordinary life.

But sometimes going elsewhere gives perspective. {Tweet that.}

(I say that, but I’ve never done anything like this. But I do know God calls us beyond ourselves.)

Greg, Cate and I are going to Guatemala for a week in July with a local mission team organized by some neighbors who are becoming friends. They’ve been going to work with Bethel Ministries for seven years, distributing wheelchairs; donating food, school supplies, and clothes to families; and building houses.

Honestly, I hesitated to commit to go this year because in my mind I saw my family of four going together – like missions are supposed to be put in a tidy box with a pretty bow on top. But I realized the three of us are supposed to do this now, regardless of how hard it is for me to leave Ben. That decision has been affirmed more than once since our January commitment.

(And let’s be honest, he’s going to have a grand time splitting the week between two grandmas.)

My girl has been asking questions and collecting school supplies. We’ve had bins for people to donate pencils and crayons – things many of us don’t count our pennies to buy – so some Guatemala families don’t have to choose between putting food on the table or sending their kids to school.

I realize we can’t solve poverty with one week of service, but we can give a few families a few less hard decisions to make in the short term and hopefully love like Jesus to make a lasting impact.

We’ve been fundraising this spring to pay for the projects we’ll complete while we’re there. Our travel costs are taken care of individually and are not part of these fundraisers. We’ve sold coffee, incredibly comfortable sheets, ribs and BBQ sandwiches, and all kinds of randomness at a two-day yard sale.

Now we are having a Trades of Hopes fundraiser, thanks to our local friend Becky Lile. And you don’t have to be local to participate in this latest fundraiser, although, local friends are welcome to join us for a fundraising party on May 17. (Let me know if you want details on that!)

Trades of Hope helps empower women out of the sex trade, sweat shops and poverty around the world by working with artisan groups in various countries. In addition to selling their lovely products, Trades of Hope teaches them entrepreneur skills to help change their futures. I have bracelets, a bag, a picture frame, and a journal that I love. I’ve gifted ornaments and scarves.

If you want to order, you have until May 17 to do so through this link. Becky’s generously donating her commissions from these sales to our team.

We’re grateful for the support we’ve received so far and looking forward to see what else God is going to do – both here and in Guatemala.
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Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."

8 Ways to Find Alone Time as a Mom

Alone time is important, but it’s not always easy to find. And personality matters. If you’re introvert, that alone time will need to come more often. Extroverts may want to go to dinner with friends.

Regardless, a mom is not just a mom. A mom is a wife, daughter, sister, friend, aunt too. Those roles are important too. Obviously, being a mom demands much time, but to do that well, we need to take care of ourselves too.

Earlier this month, I spent an entire Saturday at a retreat for adoptive moms. I’m was technically helping with the Hope That Binds retreat, but, seriously, what a gift this time was. And not just the time – the food and gifts and conversations filled up my soul.

“Jesus was intentional about finding time to refuel. He knew there were many demands upon his time and energy and he had to be a good steward of his body, soul, and mind. Nobody had to tell him, 'Jesus, go rest.' Instead he recognized his need to pull away from the crowds and find the refreshment he needed. 

As moms, we need to do the same. People and responsibilities demand much from us and we have to be good stewards of our body, soul, and mind. We can't wait until we're drained dry or until someone comes along and offers to watch our kids (like that happens very often!). Instead we have to learn to be proactive about our self-care so that we can be ready to meet the needs of our family.”

{Jill Savage in “Real Moms ... Real Jesus”}

Here are some ideas to get time alone ...

1. Don’t always work during naptime. The dishes can wait.

2. Hang out with your husband after the kids are in bed. Your marriage needs to be a priority.

3. Plan dinner out with a friend.

4. Dads don’t babysit – they hang out with their kids. My husband often headed up bath time in the evenings so I could sit down … or clean up the kitchen. {Praise God the kids can shower themselves now!}

5. Preschool is good for the momma soul.

6. Let grandparents spend time with your kids without you.

7. Swap childcare with friends. My friends and I had a babysitting coop for a season when our kids were toddlers and preschoolers. Two moms would watch kids for a few hours one day a month while the other moms could go do whatever – work, rest, lunch with grownups, appointments. We planned months in advance so the moms could make plans.

8. Get up earlier than your kids. I never do this, but, hey, I know people who do ... 

Regardless, make sure you make time for yourself – somehow – and don’t feel guilty about doing so.

“Choosing yourself is not wrong. The longer you go without taking time for yourself, the more resentment will fester, exhaustion will set in, and you will have nothing left to give – to anyone. Guilt has no place in the decision to take care of yourself. 

This self-inflicted guilt is holding us hostage. It also drives a wedge between us and intimacy with the Father. We cannot let guilt block us from experiencing the freedom we have in Christ and all the blessings he has for us.”

{Jessica Turner in “The Fringe Hours: Making Time For You”}

As a mom, how do you find time – even small pockets of time – for yourself?
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Hey, mommas, consider both "Real Moms, Real Jesus" and "The Fringe Hours: Making Time for You" recommendations. They're both packed with such practical advice. 

I'm linking this post with the Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood Gathering, where Jen Ferguson encourages women well. 

Want more insights? "Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family" is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin', or subscribe to receive "Insights in Your Inbox."